You're Lovely, but Let's Not Meet Again.

That would be me, talking to Flagler Hospital.

In the past week, we've been in the ER, THREE separate times. 

It's a quite lovely hospital  and the staff is all very nice, but I never, EVER, EVER want to see that ER again.

From my previous posts, you know that Henry broke his arm.  That was the reason for our visit last Sunday.  I am happy to report that he's doing really well.  He got his permanent  (well semi-permanent) cast on Friday- Ryan picked a blue one so we could put "Thomas the Train" stickers on it. :)  Henry's done remarkably well with it.  It doesn't bother him at all.  I thought he'd be ripping at the thing, or fussing to get it off.  He has just gone on with life as normal- very resilient!  And we did get some good news at the orthopedist- he only has to wear the cast for 4 weeks, not 6! :)  YAY!  He actually gets his cast off the day before we go to Disney ;)

So... back to the ER.  Me.  In the ER.

Thursday night I went to bed feeling like a million bucks- I had a hair appointment the next day and Ryan was getting out of work early to help take Henry to get his cast on.  Friday was destined to be a good day!  I woke up around 3 AM with what I can only describe, as labor pains?!  Cramping and lots of back pain... if I weren't 5 weeks post partum, I'd think I was on that show "I didn't Know I was Pregnant." It was bizarre.  I got up and took a shower.  I paced and paced.  I tried going to the bathroom.  I'd lie down for 5 minutes and shoot back up in bed with this searing pain.  The pain was in my back, on my left side.   My first thought was renal failure (because... that's my hypochondria speaking).   I started to panic and around 4:30 I told Ryan I needed to go into the ER.

With 3 little ones still snoozing, we decided it would be best for me to drive myself in.  Ryan would wait with the kids until a decent hour (say 6/7) and then call my mom to have her come and watch the kids.

I got to the ER around 5 or so.  I was acting like a complete baby.  I needed pain meds and I needed them STAT.  I moaned and groaned as the doctor tapped on my kidneys.  (it really did hurt like mad when he tapped them- especially my left one).  They drew blood, put in an IV, gave me some fluids and some amazing pain medicine that made me feel like I was in a beautiful dreamland ;).  They ordered a CAT scan to check for kidney stones.  As they were prepping me for the scan, I asked to use the bathroom.   To my shock and surprise, ummm... out came a stone.  Like a STONE.  When they say kidney STONES, they aren't kidding.  They are like stones you'd find out in the flipping yard.  They had given me a strainer (to catch any stones) and I have to say carrying that sucker back, I felt proud.  The doc had talked with me a little about kidney stones and said that most of the time they were like grains of sand.  My stone, however, was the size of a pea.  NO JOKE.  I would post a photo of it (because yes, I did take a picture on my phone of it for my dad and Ryan to see) but that's just a little too gross.  Instead I'll post a picture of somebody elses' stone (from google) that look a lot like mine! ;)

Lovely, eh?

After I passed the stone, they bottled it up in a biohazard baggie for me to take to the urologist.  On top of the kidney stones, I also have a UTI.  They gave me a strong dose of antibiotics (through my IV) for that- and it was incredible how much better I was feeling after the stone and the medicine.

I was discharged, and spent the day sleeping.  Around 3 PM, I woke up with a fever.  Fab.  One of the instructions I had been given at the hospital, was if I were to run a fever, I'd need to go back into the ER. 

Around 4ish, we headed back up to the hospital. 

This time, they gave me bag after bag of fluids and some more pain meds.  They kept me for most of the night, making sure my fever was under control and I was getting enough fluids.  (they think the reason why I had gotten the fever in the first place was dehydration).

TODAY... I am feeling WAY better.  No fever, no kidney pain.  Just a little achy.

I swear its always something around here.  Lord up there?  Can we just slowwww it down a bit?  I'd much appreciate it :)

Here's to a better (MUCH, MUCH better) week!


the paper mama's photo challenge!
this week (RED)..

A friend gave me this adorable red hat when Maeve was a baby.  It's cycled through all of my kids now :)  I think initially, I paired it with a strawberry outfit, but today, I'm calling it an apple... for fall of course :)

the break.

SO.... it was only a matter of time.

Henry, my daredevil, my 100% rough and tumble boy, my heart attack kid, broke his first bone.  BONES to be exact. 

Here's the rundown on what happened.

 We ate dinner at my parents house last night.  They have a high chair, but Henry refuses to sit in it.  We use a booster at home, and he eats right up at the table and apparently prefers that.  We were all sitting at the table, (Henry included- in a regular chair) and Henry kind of slid off the side of his chair and fell to the floor.  My sister was on one side of him and I was on the other.  We  all scrambled to pick him up.  What I saw, was Henry hit his head on this toy doll bed that was underneath the table.  We initially paid attention to his head- which yes, had a huge goose egg on it.  He was definitely screaming and crying a bunch, but looking at his head, it was understandable. 

We left shortly after the incident, and I was kind of getting the feeling like something was wrong because Henry cried the whole way home.  Normally, he loves watching movies in the van and sitting in his carseat.  When we got home, I went to get him out and noticed his entire left arm was limp.  He wasn't using it to reach out to me, and it was just hanging to the side. 

We brought him inside and he was still whimpering/whining... not really crying- more of just a whine like he wasn't feeling good.  We watched him for about 5 minutes and realized something was wrong with his arm.  He wouldn't pick up anything with it, and any time he tried to move it he'd start screaming.  So... Ryan rushed him off to the ER and I stayed with Maeve & Stella until my mom could come over.

By the time I got to the ER, they had "fast tracked" him- which is this awesome idea, of sending the minor injuries (such as broken bones, stitches, etc.) to one end of the ER versus waiting in line behind someone who's having a major medical issue like a heart attack or something.  I was the typical frantic mother, running in asking where my little boy was, as the room they sent me to initially was empty.  The nurse said he was getting x-rays and would be back soon. 

As soon as I sat down to catch my breath, I heard the screaming- it was awwwwful.  You could hear Henry screaming through the entire ER wing.  I know I looked like a complete freak, because I ran out to the front desk and said "That's my little guy crying!  Where is he?  I need to get to him!"  But the nurse said only Ryan was allowed in there and they'd be back soon... so I had to sit there in the room and listen to his screaming.  That was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.  :(  They told me he had been given some pain medicine, but all I could focus on was his screaming.  It was a nightmare.

FINALLY, after what seemed like an hour (but was only about 10 minutes maybe?) they came back in the room.  The doc came in a little bit later and showed us his x-ray.  He had a buckle fracture in both his radius and ulna.  And since he was a pediatric patient (a very little pediatric patient) they didn't want to touch it.  They splinted it, and referred us to an orthopedic specialist in Jacksonville, which is where he'll get his cast. 

They gave him some codene, so he slept pretty well last night.  And because he's such a tough little dude, he's been coping with his giant sling thing this morning. 

All in all, the injury is not so bad- it didn't get his growth plates at all, and his elbow is fine.  Those were the two main concerns the doc had. 

Buddy seems to be doing okay- besides being glued to me (which is both good and bad- good, because I love cuddles, bad because I have a newborn who likes to eat 24/7). 

My mom is coming over this morning to help out (praise the Lord).

For now, we're just hanging out... thanking God it was something (relatively) minor.

Thanks for all the thoughts :)

Here are some pics of the child who is going to give me gray hair by the age of 30 ;) :

1-6/365

***As SOON as I figure out where I saw the 365 photo day challenge I will post it- ASAP!   If anyone knows where the linky is to this, or the button, please let me know! :)

Anyways, the challenge is to take a photo each and every day of the year.  I know it seems like I post pictures a lot, but I probably only use my camera a few times a week.  My point and shoot broke awhile ago, and sometimes I'm just too plain lazy to get the SLR out.

The nifty thing is, I have a rebel and a 40d.  So my plan is to keep the rebel out (on the shelf, well distanced from tiny hands ;) for every day use.  We'll see how it goes.

The post is titled "1-6/365" because in Florida, I didn't have a way to transfer the pictures from my camera to the computer.  I DID take a new picture each day though :) 

1/365



in FL, playing at the park.

2/365

my fave place to eat!  "Corky Bells" in Palatka :)

3/365

the day before we left, we went to the alligator farm... I find gators to be disgusting.



4/365

Jan. 4th- the flight home... actually this was waiting to board.  She loved watching the airplanes.

5/365

awful, awful picture and I hate looking at it,  but this is the only pic I took yesterday :( 

6/365

this morning.  Looking like the bruiser he is.









And now I'm sure you're all wondering the story behind these pics:

Last night after dinner, Ryan was giving the kids a bath.  They were splashing, & being crazy as usual.  I was in the kitchen putting groceries away, and I heard a boom, then some crying, and then Ryan called out, "Hey Ash?  Ummm can you come here?"

Henry had been standing in the tub, slipped and bonked his eyeball on the edge of the tub.  The edging of our tub isn't sharp at all- its that plastic-y stuff, but he hit it so hard, the skin literally just split open.

We got it to stop bleeding, but because of where the cut was at, we thought we should take him in. 

The ER was great- I think we were in and out within an hour- NO JOKE.  We were triaged immediately and then taken back to a room.  A PA came in and looked at the cut and said we could get by with gluing it- NO stitches!

A few minutes later, a nurse and the PA came back in, they held him down and spread the glue on.  Henry did fine- unfortunately, the cut is in a really awkward place.  The PA actually told us "Well, this isn't my best glue job."  Hmmm... thanks?

We had to wait a little bit to make sure it was sticking together (every time Henry blinked, it would bleed...).  Thank God, the glue ended up working... and we were outta there!

So my poor man has this awful looking eyeball.... I want to put a bandage on it, but they said he'd pick at it, thus leading to more damage. 

I need to pick up some bread for dinner tonight, and I'm dreading the comments and looks we're going to get at the store.

Honestly, the pictures make the cut look way worse than it actually is.  The cut itself (when they cleaned it off) was about an inch long- it was split like a hot dog, but it really wasn't that long at all.  It looks horrible today, because the dermaglue mixed with the blood, spread all over his cheek & eye area.  I'm a little nervous about touching that area at all- but I think I'm going to try and wash some of it off today...

We Rang in 2011... ER Style.

Ughhh.  Let me start by saying the emergency room is the last place to be on New Years.

I guess the real story starts a week ago.   My dad came down with some horrible flu.  He ran a fever, stayed in bed for 3 days, and complained... a lot.

We've been smushed in this {quaint} house for a good 10 days now; it was inevitable that the flu would spread.  And it did.

Both of my kids started running low fevers yesterday morning.  No big deal- we alternated motrin and tylenol, and did lots of rocking and walking around.

Last night, when we put Henry down, he was warm- but not crazy hot or anything.  In fact, it was Maeve who was spiking the high fever. 

Around 1 AM, Henry woke up with this horrible sounding wheeze.

Ryan got him a bottle, I held him for a bit.  We laid him back down 20 minutes later or so.  After a few minutes we (Ryan and I) both looked at each other and said (something like) "What's wrong with his breathing?"

We listened to it for about 10 more minutes and decided it was better to be safe than sorry.  It sounded like he was breathing through a straw- wheezing and coughing- and then when he'd start to fuss, it would turn into a bark like noise, with really heavy breathing.

Off to the ER we went.  We left Maeve with my parents so it was just Ryan, Henry and I.

We got triaged and placed in a room right away which I was soooooo thankful for, considering the entire waiting room was filled with loud, obnoxious, barfing drunks.

Henry's oxygen was a little low so they gave him a breathing treatment.  Just a FYI- 1 year olds do not like to have oxygen masks strapped to their faces.

He had a high fever (103) that wasn't going away with motrin, so they did some blood work and a chest x-ray to rule out pneumonia. 

When the doc got in to see us, he was concerned about the buddy's breathing.  He said he was oxygenating well (which is a great thing) but his breathing was too labored to send him home :(.  So we waited, and waited, and waited.

Around 5 AM (or so), the doc ordered a series of shots to help open his airway.  They talked to us about asthma for a bit.  :( :( :(

Around 7 AM, we finally got all the tests back.  Henry has croup and the flu... and probably asthma.  The ER doc didn't diagnose him as an asthmatic, but we have to see Dr. Williams as soon as we get home for an assessment. 

At 10 AM we were FINALLY DISCHARGED.

It was a long, long, long night.

We're home now.  Well, "home" as in, we're at my parents house.  The goal is to keep BOTH kids fevers down.  Henry's on antibiotics and I'm praying Maeve isn't following behind.  Hopefully her flu will just stay the flu, run its course, and be gone. 

-and just a note to my fellow Jacksonians- we're pretty darn lucky when it comes to our emergency room!  Compared to the one we just visited, Allegiance is like a hotel or something. 

Happy 2011, eh?

Happy 50th Ma!

OH MY LORD. What a day. Yesterday.

It was my mom's 50th birthday- one she wasn't too excited about celebrating. She's really not the kind of woman that enjoys getting riper with age! She'd love to be 20 again. The day started out great- Maeve had ballet at 10- my mom was feeling good and I was happy Maeve's ballet class fell on mom's birthday- since ballet and Maeve are my mom's two loves :) Next was lunch at Anna's. Again, everything seemed fine- we ate, I lost my mind for a little bit as Maeve decided to run through the store barely dodging very fragile items. (ahhh). Dinner was planned for 5 because Ryan, Maeve, Henry and I were going to go to the U of M/State meet up in Ann Arbor. It was a last minute thing that I saw advertised on facebook yesterday and I decided it would be fun for us to go. Admission was a buck and it was Hawaiian night. Plus I had been wanting to see how Maeve would do at a meet. After dinner (again, mom was acting totally normal) we headed up to Ann Arbor and my mom went back to work at the studio. The meet went great- Maeve loved it. She called the girls "monkeys" as they were swinging on the bars ;) But we decided to leave about 30 minutes early because Henry was starting to fuss and Maeve was beginning to wander through the rows of seats. About a half hour into our car ride home, my phone rang- it was my dad. He told me my mom had been taken to the ER for one of her heart episodes. Coincidentally, we were about 10 miles from the Elm street exit so I told him I'd be there in 15 minutes or so.

Ryan raced me to the hospital and I ran into the ER- completely forgetting about the kids (oops!) Thankfully Ryan is a good dadda who takes lots of notes on how to defrost milk (by not putting it the microwave!!) and making bottles! :) When I got there, it was a bit hectic. Her heart rate was soaring between 260-270. She was having a hard time breathing so she was on oxygen. The doctors had just finished giving her a medicine called adentin which stopped her heart long enough for it to get back into a normal rhythm. VERY quickly, her heart rate started dropping back down to a normal range. Within about a half hour it was in the 90s. After things settled down a bit, we sat and waited, and waited, and waited. Her labs came back a little abnormal- her potassium was low. So they gave her some... then we waited longer. When all was said and done, they couldn't tell her why her heart had done that- but they did say she was lucky to get into the ER so they could capture it on the EKG so that maybe a cardiologist could figure it out.

That's where my mom is today- at the cardiologist, trying to get this under control. It was really scary and I am so thankful she's alright.

There is a part two to this story: Today just happened to be Henry's two month appointment. My mom was planning on watching Maeve this morning, but of course, with everything that happened last night, she was in no condition to watch her. That meant me bringing both kids to the doc. (one of whom is petrified of the doctors). I was nervous; My friend Jessy and I joke that they keep those office rooms at 100 degrees because as soon as you get in there with all your kids we start to sweat. No different today. I got in there, Maeve immediately started jumping on the scale (that is clearly marked "KEEP CHILDREN OFF SCALE") I am trying to get Henry down to a dry diaper while yanking Maeve off the scale. THANK GOD for the "Tarzan" book that happened to be in the room- it kept Maeve busy enough for me to get H undressed and weighed. After the nurse left, I was then informed by the billing lady that my dear, dear husband had not submitted a form for Henry yet and therefore, this visit (including the 4 vaccines he got) would not be covered. Talk about starting to sweat. After the billing lady left I got on the phone with Ryan and started hissing in that low, really ticked off sounding voice, about how he should be here dealing with the billing and with his out of control 2 year old daughter.

I'm not sure if the doctor was busy operating on a patient, performing open heart surgery or something, but we were left in that small, HOT room for about 20 minutes. I was about to melt onto the floor. Maeve was already ON the floor- with her MOUTH OPEN SCREAMING at the top of her lungs. She wanted to go out to the chalk board and color. I will call it a true miracle if Maeve doesn't get sick here within the next few weeks- literally, her mouth was open on the floor. Eventually it got so loud (of course Henry had to join in on the screaming fun) that the nurse came in and TOOK MAEVE OUT for me. Are you kidding me??????????? Granted, the nurse, Brooke is *kind of* a friend (meaning, we would say hi and chat for a minute if we saw each other at the store) but yeah, pretty embarrassing. I totally could just hear them saying "that poor mom- she can't handle her kids." UGHHHH.

Now onto Mr. Henry... Dr. Williams finally made her way into the room and by this time I am fairly sure my mascara was running from the sweat, my shirt was crooked exposing my bra (due to Maeve pulling on it) and I had that overall look of "shoot me now" on my face. She did his exam in about two minutes flat. His skin isn't looking too hot- he has to be on some hydrocortizone cream... his blocked tear duct isn't looking great either. We're going to wait until he's at least 6 months until we talk about doing anything to it. She's also pretty sure he's got a milk allergy. FABULOUS! My choices are soy based formulas or cutting out my dairy. We'll see what happens within the next few weeks. As of now, I'm planning on nursing but she went on and on about how "great of a start" I've given him and to not feel badly about quitting. She's seen a lot of moms go insane over trying to figure out what's making their baby so gassy and uncomfortable. Sometimes it isn't worth eliminating half of your diet. (keep in mind dairy isn't just found in milk and cheeses). As far as Henry's weight/height- he's 12 lbs 15 oz (lost an ounce since last visit) and I've already forgotten his height (its written on a sticker somewhere around here...) I DO know that both his height and weight are in the 75th percentile and his head is in the 50th. He got his 4 pokes (poor guy). After we picked up Maeve from the nurses station we high tailed it out of there, but not before apologizing profusely to the nurses, doctor and anyone else that was subjected to the screaming coming from room 8. On our way home I called my sister in pure desperation- I BEGGED her to watch Maeve for just an hour so I could come home, nurse Henry, give him a bath (he LOVES his baths) and just cuddle him for a minute or two. I have a good sister (actually I have 2 good sisters :) she played hide & go seek w/ Maeve for 45 minutes or so while I got some time with Henry.

Maeve is now eating a lunch of peanut butter banana sandwiches and cheese. Henry is sleeping. I am sitting for the first time today without a screaming child in my arms. Counting down to 1:00... nap time nap time nap time. :)

***oooh one more note: Stay tuned to the blog... the McKenney family has a very big announcement to make (soon-ish). And no, I can say with 100% confidence I am NOT preggo!! :)

Update on Me. (Ashley)

Last night was completely awful. I started feeling pretty bad around 6 or 7. But figured I just needed to get in bed and get some sleep. So I tried to sleep... but I started getting the shakes and running a fever. I was super uncomfortable. So I took a bath and sent Ryan off for some gatorade and a slushie. The slushie helped my mouth feel better but I was still running quite the fever (103 was the highest it got) SO began the slew of phonecalls- first to the nurses line- they told us to elevate my head (when is your head NOT elevated??) and put an ice pack on my cheek. Did that- still wasn't feeling better. Then we called the pharmacy to see when I could take more vicodin. They said every 6 hours. DANG- I was taking it like clockwork every 6 hours- I was really hoping they'd say I could take two. Finally after taking a vicodin and motrin at 8:30 or so, and waiting the alloted 2 hours (thats how long they said it takes for the vicodin to kick in) we called Dr. Watterson. He said basically the same thing that everyone else had said- take more vicodin around midnight and combine it with motrin. It was around 9:30 or 10 by this time and I couldn't imagine waiting FOUR MORE HOURS for pain relief (according to everyone vicodin doesn't take effect for 2 hours so- 2 hours till midnight and 2 hours till pain relief. I WAS MISERABLE. But I waited, and waited. Finally it was midnight- but by this time, the pain was so intense and my fever was so high that my heart was racing and I was dizzy and naseaus.
I rationalized with Ryan that either I could sit here in pain all night and continue making calls to the doctor or we could "run" up to the ER, get some pain relief and finally get some sleep. Ryan wasn't too happy about it- I think he thought I was overreacting.
Anyhow, my mom came over around midnight to stay with Maeve and Ryan and I made our way to the ER. Once there, they triaged me- my temp had come down to 102, but my heart rate was extremely high- which concerned them that I might be dehydrated. So off to a room I went. I was there for a total of 4 hours and let me just say again, that our local emergency room is fantastic. It really is- I was treated within minutes of getting there- I saw a doctor within the first half hour and I had a great staff of nurses checking on me and helping me out. Long story short, I have some sort of infection in my tooth (which we already knew- but since Waterson decided to dig around in there for an hour yesterday it made the infection flare up even worse.) I was also very dehydrated- that was why my heartrate was in the 150s and why I was feeling so naseaus. So they gave me an IV and some bags of fluid which did WONDERS. I felt a ton better just a couple hours after getting there- they also gave me some pain meds. through my IV that knocked me out (YEA I could finally sleep!) and they also gave me some anti-infection meds. We got outta there around 4 or so- I felt a million times better- but 7:30 came bright and early this morning. Ryan had gone to work, my mom had gone home and it was just me and Maeve. I feel hungover on meds. I feel dehydrated again and my face is the size of Texas. But my mom is coming over to help with Maeve in a bit... and I am hoping the new meds the hospital put me on will help. Anyways, thats the jist of whats going on.

:( Boo.

In The Blink Of An Eye.

Last night I posted how Maeve hadn't been feeling well- she's had a cough this week and a runny nose and some low grade fevers- all of which the doctors told me was teething. Last night around 8 I went into check on her and she was burning up= I immediately stripped her down out of her pjs and had Ryan take a temp. Under her armpit it was 103... SO we called the nursing line, and they said to bring her into the ER.

Around 9:30 or so we bundled her up, and brought her into the emergency room. I was terrified because she had never had such a high fever- and by the look in her eyes, you could tell she was really sick. They triaged her right away,and her temp was still high but her heart rate was even higher- it was 170/180s- super scary :( They took us right back to a room and I knew they thought something was really going on because they had us put her in a gown. Last time we were at the ER with her rash from the amox. they just had us undress her. This time though, the wanted her in a gown so they could do some chest xrays. She had her little finger monitor on and her gown and they took a rectal temp- 102.9... they said that was a high fever and she definitely had something going on. It took about a half hour to get the xrays back, but they confirmed that she has pnemonia. So our little May bug isn't doing too great :( I mean, she'll get better after the antibiotics, but we're on pins and needles because any worsening of the fever or cough and she will have to be hospitalized. They talked about keeping her last night, but decided it would be okay to go home as long as we kept a good eye on her. Maeve slept with me last night and I am thrilled to report that this morning there is NO FEVER! :) I am praying that it will stay that way and that we caught it early enough that we won't have any more issues- I've already contacted her primary doc. and they want to see her today and Monday so I feel like I've got a good team around her, watching her and making sure she'll be fine :)
Prayers would definitely be appreciated- as we left the hospital we were given handouts on the seriousness of pneumonia and to say the least, it terrified me. Again though, we're glad we caught it early and that her doc. is on top of it- Ryan and I's job is to keep that fever down and at the first sign of a worsening cough or breathing, bring her to the ER.
What a long night huh??? We finally got home around 1 or so. But I do need to say that Alliegance (Foote) hospital was absolutely wonderful- from the check in process to the triage to the room at the ER. EVERY single person was friendly, concerned and treated Maeve wonderfully :) The service was quick- I mean QUICK! We were thinking we would be stuck in the ER all night, but we really were in and out- Maeve even had to have xrays, but we were still out by 1. I am proud to have that hospital in our town! :) It really was fantastic service!!! And the doc she had was super nice and very concerned and understanding :) haha when he told us she had pneumonia I started crying (long night+anxiety+looming period due anyday= LOTS OF EMOTION!!)

I think what freaked me out the most was how Maeve went from being "okay" (she had a cough and runny nose and I could tell she wasn't feeling good, but I had NO CLUE how serious it was!) to Maeve having a high fever and getting xrays in the ER. Really, it seemed like it all went by in the blink of an eye.

Today we're going to rest- ME INCLUDED!!! YEA! My mom is going to come over in about an hour to watch Maeve so I can sleep a bit since we were up a good part of the night (I didn't actually go to bed until 2 or so and Maeve woke up around 8)

Have a good Halloween everyone! And if you have a second say a quick get better prayer for Maeve! Thanks!!!!

Update on Maeve

Well the buggy is doing much better today, but yesterday- YIKES it was bad news. Actually I should go back to Thursday night- thats when she got really sick- she started running a fever that hovered around 102. She was incredibly clingy and just sick looking. :( it was so sad! She just wanted me to hold her and to have her baba (aka her bottle) Even though she was so crabby and cruddy feeling, she was fighting sleep like crazy! So I took her into lay with me (Ryan was at class) two seconds after we lay down "BLAHHHHHHH" She pukied her entire dinner contents on me- ravioli, applesauce, milk and cake batter ice cream. It was the most sour smelling stuff!!! I have a confession to make: I have a fear of vomiting- really its like a phobia. When I was seeing a therapist for my anxiety we actually had several sessions about vomiting- one where she made me say the word over and over again... shortly after that session I quit going- really therapists are on a different planet I think. ANYWAYS, I always wondered what was going to happen the first time Maeve puked- I always figured, well I'll have Ryan take care of it, and I'll take care of her. Of course she's spit up a million times, but any mom can tell you the difference between VOMIT and spit up. So back to Thursday night, RYAN was at class till 9:30 and here I was with MaeMae covered in sooooouuuur puke. But apparently I have some good motherly instincts because I scooped her up, stripped her down (and myself), hopped in the shower and scrubbed her clean. I think the shower also made her feel a bit better... after the puke she went right to sleep- and I went to clean the bed...ugghhhh- remember- I always thought Ryan would be there for the first puking episode!!! But nope it was just me, and I survived :) After the sheets were changed and things were as clean as they would get, I layed down to go to sleep. But I had this nagging feeling that something wasn't right with Maeve- so I went in to check on her- AGAIN, she had thrown up- this time in her crib and AGAIN on herself. SO back to the shower we went. After a new pair of p.js we went back to our bed and she fell asleep. What a crappy night! (no pun intended)

The next day, Friday, she looked worse for wear- her cheeks were swollen and puffy looking and red and she was running a fever. I took her to my moms and we decided she was still reacting to that dang shot. A few hours later at Paneras for lunch, we noticed that Maeve's right cheek was really swelling up- like the swelling and redness was going up to her eye. My mom was like "Ashley call the doc. this isn't right!" SO I called Dr.Williams and they said to bring her right in- but they also told me to watch her breathing and to call 911 or go to the ER if she appears to be having difficulty. Needless to say, this anxiety freak, freaked OUT. I had to take a good amount of ativan just to stay in the situation! I held Maeve in the back seat while my mom drove to the doc. We got there and they saw us right away... the final verdict????? She BUMPED her cheek- they called it a contusion or in other words, a BRUISE!!! All that flipping out over a bruise... anyhow, I was incredibly grateful when we left the doc. that she was okay!! :)

Today (Saturday) her cheek still looks pretty bad- its all dried and scaly- not sure why. I guess dried skin?

Well its been an eventful few days here... and I know we just went on a vacay... but really, now I feel like I need a vacation!

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

Isn't that how it goes? Or something like that anyways... I just posted about how I am weaning off that stupid anxiety medication but ever since I have been completely off of it, I've been feeling horrible... not having withdrawals or anything but having super bad anxiety. I know its compounded by the fact that my once normal, happy, healthy baby has turned into a nocturnal, fussy, hive covered baby (no she doesn't still have hives but I think that whole ER experience took a few hours, if not days off of my life). So I had to call the doc. and schedule an appointment to get BACK on some kind of medication. It stinks- I've been so down about it, but once again I am weighing the options- be med. free, 5 lb.s lighter and a basket case of nerves or taking a couple pills a day, being a bit pudgier and being cool as a cucumber. I think I will pick the second option... I've been down the road of the first too many times and it always ends in this big ordeal (usually at the ER...). Ugh how discouraging... but I guess thats life- you really can't have it all can you?

Back From the ER

This is my baby's poor thigh/leg area... I swear its getting worse by the second!

She's still a happy bubba though! Even though her poor little cheeks have hivey looking things all over them :(

Sooooo we spent our morning in the sick as all get out ER. Actually we had relatively quick service getting triaged, into a room and seen by a nurse. But the doctor part took FOREVER. The only reason we took her into the ER is because her doctor is referring all patients to the ER just this one particular weekend. What luck we have! So anyways, I was thinking its gotta be chicken pox because these things are appearing by the second... all over her! But when the doc. came in (actually it was one of those "pretend" doctors... the P.A.'s- which don't get me wrong, I know they are smart and all, but when I go to the hospital I wanna see a DOCTOR. Just like when I go to the doctor and I have to see the freaking nurse practitioner. Lame.) he said he didn't know what it was. He said she definitely had a yeast infection from the antibiotics she was just on, but as far as the spots/pox go, he said it was hard to tell. So he said give her benedryl, keep her comfortable and see your regular doctor on Monday. Thanks PA! I could've pulled that diagnosis out of my butt! I DO watch a LOT of ER and diagnosis X, thank you very much! :)

Ugh... I guess I'm just a bit frustrated because of all the money you pay into health insurance and we just spent a fortune being told to give Maeve benedryl and see her doc??? Why couldn't a nurse have told me that on the phone? Ohhhh yeah- because this ONE weekend, there was no nurse hot line... all patients had to go to the ER. Bunch a bull I tell ya.
Anyways I am thankful Maeve is fine and I guess we're just waiting until Monday to see what these spots are. My motherly instinct tells me they're chicken pox though. We'll see if I'm right ;) Now I am off to scrub the sickness that began seeping into our pores the second we stepped into the germ pool known as the ER.

The Chickie Pox???

I think my baby girl has the chicken pox!!!!! WHAT???? I thought kids didn't get that until they were exposed to other kids at school!!! Yesterday, before we gave Maeve her little pool party, we noticed she had some bug bite looking things underneath her right arm. But we brushed them off as being mosquito bites... well then this morning (after a fitful, restless night of sleep for Maeve) she woke up with bumps everywhere!!! They're the worst on her diaper area but I swear they are multiplying by the second. I just snapped a few pictures so you guys give me your opinion!!! We are waiting for a call back from the nurse healthline... I guess I am just scared its NOT chicken pox and its some sort of horrible rash... but honestly, it looks just like the pox to me... and really, her little bumps are multiplying- every time I look at her shes got new bumps! The good news is she doesn't seem too bothered by them... she is a bit fussy but she's been that way all week b/c of her ear infection.

Okay the doc just called back and he wants us to take her into the ER. :( I am pretty upset... say some prayers! I really thought it was just chicken pox- I am praying its not something else!!! :( Say prayers for little Maybug!!!!!

Anxiety's a Beeetch. But I've kicked its butt... for now.

Not that you really care to read this, but I am in the process of weaning off my anxiety meds. What started my anxiety you ask? I really have no clue. I started getting some butt kicking panic attacks a few years ago, but they were few and far between... no biggie, they just sucked when they happened. Like lots of people, I have this fear of losing control. Sometimes it can be over really stupid things like not having control over where we go to dinner (seriously that can trigger my anxiety) and sometimes its really huge stuff, like well, going through a pregnancy and birth! That was by far, the most challenging thing I've ever done. I had to put myself completely in the hands of doctors and God, of course. I had to have faith and put trust in someone other than myself... and that was SO hard. Anyways, after I gave birth to my beauty, my anxiety got completely out of control. It was this entire entity of its own. I had multiple panic attacks a day. I was freaking out over every little thing- (oh yeah those of you who don't know me well I am a GERMAPHOBE. I wash my hands constantly and sanitize any and every surface that food comes in contact with.) After my umpteenth time to the ER, the docs. decided I needed to go on some sort of controller medication. So began my journey into the world of mood altering drugs... I have tried SO many different medications, some have worked, some haven't. I have had the most bizarre side effects from them- night terrors, weight gain, headaches, tummy aches, sleepiness... Its been rough! Well I just had to announce that I am weaning off my anxiety meds!!! I am SO excited! My doctor and I both feel like I can do this without medication and I am pumped. Just wanted to share :)

The Hottest Summer

Wooooah Baby it was hot that summer! I waddled around in skirts and tank tops with a water bottle in one hand and a chocolate milkshake in the other. Of course I was suffering through this hot summer during my LAST trimester! I entered into the first week of my 3rd trimester around mid July. My 2nd trimester had gone fantastically so I was hopeful for the 3rd. Right from the start of it though things were very different. I started gaining weight like nobody's business (yes I know now, not to drink 3 milkshakes a day) and I started getting these strange heart palpitations. At first they were just incredibly annoying, but then they got to be downright scary. I mentioned them to my doctor a few times and he said they were from anxiety (which I suffer from) so I was trying to brush them off as just that- anxiety. But as the due date approached, the heat got hotter, and my belly got bigger, the heart palps. got so bad. One day I was at the dance studio with my little sis, Em. We were all by ourselves, just working on some paper stuff. I went to the bathroom and when I stood up to go, I got this hot flash and a few really bad heart palps. It felt like heat had gone from my toes up to my head. My ears were buzzing and I had splotchy vision for a few seconds. Emily knew something was wrong so she was like "Ashley call Ryan and lets go." So Ryan met us at the house and we drove up to the ER. It was around 2 or 3 in the afternoon when we got there and they admitted me right away. It was terrifying- I truly hope none of you ever have to go through something like this!!! I was hooked up to about a bazillion monitors and questions were being thrown at me left and right. I had one nurse trying to get my heart rate and another trying to get sweet Maeves. I was crying and begging for my dad... (sweet huh? Dads make everything better, I swear by that.) After a very long night in the ER and a few rounds of saline, and an anti anxiety drug, AND an Echo, EKG and too much blood work to even begin to think about, I was released with a beta blocker and the order to see a cardiologist. So the ending of this whole story is that I had to wear a holtor monitor and be on a beta blocker at the end of my pregnancy. The heart palps. never went away though- I had them through the entire delivery and my post partum stay at the hospital. They finally went away sometime in mid November. Scary stuff..... Needless to say, I had a horrendous 3rd trimester and was SO READY for October to get there!!!