Friday, July 13, 2012

Bad Bladder Bad! Behave Bladder!

Hot nelly its been a couple days around here!

My mom and grandma showed up at our place around 5 AM to watch our sleeping babies. 

Yesterday, before the sun was up, I was on my way to the local hospital, making small talk with Ryan. It was my first surgery, ever. And "nervous"is too insignificant a word to represent how I was feeling.

The instant I walked into the hospital I was smacked down with a load of papers... living will...consent for blood... GAHHH!  It was definitely not a warm welcoming.  (although the nurses themselves were and almost always are great).

By 7 AM I was hooked up to fluids, naseua medication, antibiotics and heart electrodes (what the heck are those things called?) 

My sweet husband kissed me good bye as I was wheeled into the pre-op room and I returned his affection by growling "Don't you dare lose my phone."  (I was already loopy from the naseua meds).

Once in the awful, horrible, most stankity stank room you could imagine, I was hooked up to a relaxant.  (cue angels and rainbows and a high pitched HALLELUJAH!!  

The pre op room reminded me of some twisted raffle game or something.  There were probably 15-20 surgery-awaiting-peeps, all lined up in neat little rows.  I was placed on the far end, in the corner.  And after observing (as much as I could without my contacts or glasses), there were plenty a serious surgeries happening this morning.  And I was (thankfully) not one of them!  Consequentially, I was forgotten about in that little corner.  Literally, a nurse came over to type something on the computer, she took a glance at me, my charts and then said "Oh my dear.  I forgot you were back here!" 

I assured her it was fine.  I didn't mind lying in the warm room with my happy meds. But I made sure to tell her it would be oh-so appreciated if they could promise me they wouldn't forget what surgical procedure I was there for.

I sat there for a bit more.  I heard stories of broken hips and hearts.  Gout and glaucoma.  And just about every other medical condition you could think of.  Without my glasses, everyone and everything looked like blobs- maybe that was a good thing.  As my neighbor had a thyroid tumor sticking so far out, she wasn't even able to swallow. 

I was beginning to relax a bit; with my "cocktail" of meds on board and the room filling up with doctors and anesthsiologists.  I watched the anesthisiologists (well, watched anesthisiologists blobs) move from bed to bed, talking about the patients surgery, asking tons of medical history questions and explaining the sedation experience.  I couldn't wait for my turn.  I had a list of questions the length of my arm and I so desperately wanted to make sure whoever was putting me out was competent. 

Well, I waited, and watied.  The room began to clear out, with patients moving on to their surgical room destination.

After what seemed like hours, an anesthsiologist came over.  Before he got any words out, I blurtted, "I don't want to feel or see anything!"  He simply looked at me and gave a really weak thumbs up.  He asked me a few questions-  allergies to meds, asthma, sleep apnea, etc.  And that was about it.  Even while drugged up, my mind began to race, "Wait a second!  You asked all these other people if they had seizures or strokes or heart disease!  Why not me?"  I most definitely felt like I was the low man on the totem pole ;)

Gail, my surgical nurse stepped in and we chatted about kids for a bit.  It helped lighten the mood.  I expressed my concern that I hadn't been able to ask any questions to anyone and was getting nervous.  And she assured me "as soon as I see the whites of Dr. Lin's eyes, he will be over here to answer all your questions."  (why are nurses so incredibly wonderful?  How does one person harvest all that sweet passion and cheer?)

True to her word, Dr. Lin came to my little corner of the room.  He is lacking in his English speaking, and with the few appointments I've had with him, he doesn't talk much.  He's more of a diagram/picture pointing guy.  And there's always a nurse in the room to help translate what he's saying.  This time however, it was just him and I.

Here's our conversation:

Me:  Hi Dr. Lin!

Dr. Lin:  Ahhhh.  Hello.  Piece of Cake.  Goodbye.

Well dang.  As the nurse rolled me out of the surgical waiting room and onto the operative table, I began blasting the room with questions.  Who the heck was the guy by my feet with the mop bucket?  Probably a janitor, but I asked him if it was going to hurt.  The two other guys who were prepping the room looked at me like I had five eyeballs as I shot questions to them like, "This isn't going to do anything to my fertility right?  I'm going to wake up, right?  Can you make sure to tell the doctor to get all my stones out?  I have four." 

The next and last thing I remembered was someone (I'm assuming/hoping it was either Dr. Lin or the anesthsiologist and not the guy with the mop bucket) saying "see you later!" 

45 minutes later I was awake and shouting obscenities at Ryan and anything else that happened to be in my room. 

"This cranberry juice tastes like (insert 4 letter word)!!!"  (I seriously never swear... only while under sedation I guess)

A nurse came in to talk with Ryan and explained that next time I have anything like this done, to make sure and let the anesthesilogist know that I react very strongly to sedation meds.  I guess it doesn't take much to knock me out. 

To be honest, I don't really remember much more about yesterday.  I slept as soon as we got into the car and fell back asleep as soon as I laid on the bed.  I stayed asleep until 4:30.  It was finally around then, when I asked how the surgery and everything went.

Ryan showed me these crazy pictures of my bladder.  He pointed out the circled spot that Dr. Lin wants to keep an eye on  (apparently it bleeds whenever my bladder is full... which isn't good).  He told me I had FIVE stones, not four, and that they should be rattling their way out soon since he had dilated my ureters. 

I did end up passing a stone yesterday- and while it wasn't too painful going down the length of my back, it hurt like ummm..... holy heck when it actually came out.  Another stone the size of a pea... OUCH OUCH OUCH.

All in all, everything went really well.  The only thing that is of concern to any of us was that bleeding spot on my bladder.  I go back in two weeks to talk about what we're going to do next.

In the meantime, I'll just be hanging around here... waiting for these stones to drop.... watching Twilight and drinking water by the case.

Thank you thank you thank you for all your prayers and thoughts!  Yes- it was a simple surgery, but it scared the junk out of me!  I could feel God's peace through the entire event though, and I still do.  I don't know what's going to come out of this bleeding spot, but I am not letting myself get worked up about it. 

And now some pictures... because you all want to see what my bladder looks like :)

Gross huh?

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