get a series of rabies shots or fly solo, with your kids on a two hour flight?
My answer? Bring on the dang rabies shots. (this is a fact by the way- my husband has had the full series of rabies shots... for real.)
I have not had ONE- NOT ONE- pleasant flying experience with my kids. Even when it was just Maeve, it was tough. Maybe not horrendous, but not enjoyable by any means.
A friend messaged me this morning asking for tips on how to fly with a baby and a toddler. After laughing for a minute or two, I told her I was the wrong person to be asking- clearly- because every flight I've been on with my kids, has been disastrous. We're almost always asked to move to the back of the plane, where, as the flight attendant puts it, we "will feel more comfortable." AKA- get your kids as far away from us as possible- even if that means you're sitting in the back row of the plane, in a jump seat without a window.
No, no, we haven't really had to sit in the jump seat- but we do almost always end up in the last row without a window. I compare this to being trapped in a box, being tortured with hot coals or something.
Every trip starts off with the best of intentions, and good thoughts. I have a bag packed, full of snacks, activities, and "prizes." I am fully stocked up on nuks, candy- all that stuff that normally thrills my kids to pieces, but then seems to have no effect on them, while on an airplane.
I am particularly concerned about flying this week because I've got two kids coming off of being sick. Henry, (as of Friday) has fluid in his ears and Maeve is still dealing with the stuffies.
After some careful thinking, I've decided to break down my flying experiences into phases, to give you a better understanding of the areas I really need some help with.
Phase one: At the airport, stressed, sweating, trying to make it through security with everyone and everything, but in a semi-cheerful mood because strangers can be so kind. They like to help put shoes on my kids, unfold the stroller, grab my stuff, etc.
Phase two: Waiting for the airplane. Excitement is in the air, because we're about to board a giant "birdy," as Maeve calls it. Things are a tad crazy. Something is guaranteed to be spilled, dumped, destroyed- watchful observers are silently praying that they won't be the lucky ones, stuck sitting by us on the plane.
Phase three: boarding. This is a debacle all in itself. I am holding Henry and the carseat, pushing a stroller, trying to keep slow poke poking along, and balancing the giant (and I mean, GIANT) carry on bag. Again, strangers are kind, and will ask if I need help. At first I was hesitant to allow anyone to help. Now I gladly hand over a bag, stroller, heck a kid- whatever, just to make it through. As we get on the plane, its almost like Russian roulette. Every single person looks up, with fear in their eyes, as we walk down the aisle- they're all thinking "PLEASE pass us. PLEASE don't sit by us..." And then we make it to our seat, and some poor teenage guy gets stuck with kicking babies, boogers and smells that could wake the dead.
Phase four: the flight itself. I might bring a themometer with me, because I am curious as to what my core temperature is while in the middle of this chaos. I feel feverish- hot- I'm sweating buckets. Maeve is kicking the seat in front of her, Henry is screaming to get down. I'm digging through my bag, practically throwing suckers, jelly beans, starburst- whatever- at Maeve. Maeve (who is probably on a sugar high; is this my problem?) is shouting embarrassing things like, "I pooped!" or "Momma, I not stink, YOU stinky. HAHA Momma pooped!" or how about, "Oh momma, you take your medicine and feel so better?" (as I'm popping my xanax).
Phase five: deboarding- or whatever you want to call it. The rush of relief is similar to just giving birth. It's over. It's done. We've made it- its time to relish in our success. I'm a mess- the kids are a mess- we've lost nuks, coloring books, sippy cups, hats, etc. All I'm thinking as I'm steering the stroller is "Get to mom. GET TO MOM."
So, moms, please, PLEASE give me some flying tips!!!
and if you want to check out our past flights, click the link/label below called "plane rides"
PS-THE DRAWING FOR A $20.00 CREDIT TO "NANNAH BREAD KNOTS" IS TONIGHT. IF YOU HAVE NOT LEFT A COMMENT, COMMENT HERE!!!!! -the contest will close at 9 PM, tonight.
***and stay tuned... the winner will be announced tomorrow AM :)