BABY FEVER!!!!!!!! I am loving Maeve and enjoying her so much and I have nagging feeling that she needs a sibling! As of now, if we were to be preggo next month, they would be exactly 2 years apart. I wanted my babies to be 2-2.5 years apart. I can pretty much guarantee you that I will not be preggo next month, or the month after that, or the month after that. You see, there is so much that needs to happen in order for us to bring another little one into our home. SO for now, I am just waiting... :( But I know it will happen when God wants it to happen, and that makes me feel better.
Its amazing to watch Maeve grow and change, but it is incredibly depressing as well. I was so excited for her to sit, to stand, to walk, to run! Now I'd love to have her swaddled up in a "under 7 lbs." bundler. :( I MISS having a baby!
Right after I had Maeve I knew I wanted to do this whole pregnancy bit, again and again and again. But I also thought "Yeah in 5 years I'll be ready to do this again!" My post partum healing was SO horrific. I won't go into details, but simply put, I DIDN'T heal, not how I was supposed to anyways. I had fevers from infections and went to the ER 4 times for anxiety attacks. GOSH do I really wanna do that all over again??? YES, I do. Because the love I have for Maeve completely shuts out any fear or apprehension that I have about pregnancy and birth. I am trusting that God will bless us with another wonderfully, fun, beautiful healthy baby. I know He will- He is the great deliverer!!! (haha no pun intended!)
Ughhh and I'm so bored tonight. Maeve went to sleep an hour ago, and I'm waiting for Ryan to get home from class. He will come bearing great gifts- MC DONALDS! Ha!
On that note, I noticed something horrible today- I was in Target and I had forgotten my handy dandy coupon organizer (yup I really carry one of those things around!) in the car. SO I had Maeve in the cart and I started to run through the parking lot- and a horrible thing was happening- my butt was actually JIGGLING. LIKE REALLY JIGGLING. It felt like I had some jello in my undies. It was horrible! And THEN I realized that was the first time I had actually RUN since Maeve's birth! I have walked many, many times, but I hadn't run- ever! So YEAH, its a good thing I'm eating McDonalds tonight right???? ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I hate dieting but it looks like I gotta start AGAIN. But not tonight... and not tomorrow (you can't ever start a diet on a weekend).