standing up and putting on the gloves.

Confessions:

Back in January I went to my first appointment up at the Mayo clinic.  At that time, I was having issues with kidney stones and bladder infections.  I was desperate for relief;  anyone who's passed a kidney stone knows they're worse than child birth.  For me, they make me sick; fever, vomiting, lethargic and then of course the pain.  And I'm knocked down for DAYS with these things.  DAYS.  Some stones pass quickly; overnight or in a single day.  But 99% of the stones I've passed (and I've passed close to 30 since Stella was born- yeah).... take days to pass.  I end up in the ER, or doctors office, bawling my eyes out, praying the docs will have mercy on me and just BLAST my stones instead of saying "Oh its small enough to pass, here's some dilauded and up your fluids!"  This has been my life for almost three years.  I thought it was bad.  Didn't think I could be hit much harder.  And then came the Mayo clinic... and everything has spiraled down hill since.

My doctors at Mayo immediately took me off my oil regimen.  They "didn't know" (their words) about the oils and therefore couldn't say anything about them.  They DID want full control over my diet, medication, etc. so they could manage my stones.  HAH.

The day I quit taking my oils (I'm talking internally- my regimen of lemon, peppermint, thieves, ginger, cinnamon, endoflex, fennel, frank, digize, and oregano) all hell broke loose.  Literally.  My body went nuts.  I replaced my oils with the medications the doctors pushed at me and I told myself, "this is because I want to get rid of my kidney stones.  The doctors are helping me."

I am by no means saying the docs had ill intentions- oh wait- Dr. Mengle from urology at Mayo- he had ill intentions- but everyone else; I think they really wanted the best for me.  Here's the thing.  Doctors don't know everything.

I have NEVER, EVER been sicker in my life than I am today.  Since cutting out my oil regimen I have A.) been to the ER 8 times (each time given IV antibiotics for bad infections) & have had two foley leg bags placed. B.) have been told I would forever be catheterizing myself because I have a neurogenic bladder- and was taught to self cath.  I now have boxes of catheters in my bathroom.  C).  MS.  Those awful two letters.

As fear, anger and every emotion in between rained down on me, I threw my hands up.  I gave up.  What's the point of eating right, exercising, taking care of my body when it was just falling apart anyways?  Screw. THIS.

People messaged me over and over;  "Take this, eat that, do this, do that!"  And all I wanted to do was be angry and quit.  And yell.  And eat.  And throw my medications against the wall and whine to my doctors and my husband.  It's been a dark few months here.  I can't lie.

I had continued to use the oils for aromatherapy (diffusing) and topically (bug bites and rashes, anxiety and sleep).  But I had stuffed the empty capsules away, completely replacing them with pill bottles, because "doctors know best."  I upped my prozac (psychiatrists suggestion after seeing how distraught and BLAH I've become these past few months) and started taking klonopin on a regular basis. The docs gave me a running script of demerol and lortab for the stone pain and sleeping pills because of my anxiety and depression over "MS."  I have been loaded for months.

Today for some reason; honestly- nothing out of the blue happened- nothing remarkable... I just clicked out of it.  And I'm done.  I'm standing up, getting out of bed and putting on my boxing gloves.  And its starting with the detox of meds and the intake of my oils.

No worries; allllll detoxing is happening with my doctors watching my every move.  My amazing PCP calls daily to ask how I'm doing...  today I told him, "I don't want to take anything anymore.  I want to look into natural routes."  And he said "awesome."  (Dr. Barringer- for local peeps- he's amazing).

So today I climbed through boxes in the garage, and unpacked my arsenal of capsules, droppers, and carrier oils and got to work.

I threw out all the crap in my pantry;  aside from some s'mores stuff for the kids :).

I said out loud to myself, "This is MY body.  MY BODY.  And I want it back."

Friends;  I will still be on many of the meds that my body has grown dependent on for the past few months.  It's not an overnight fix.  None of this is.  But its a start.  And I have a goal.  I have a will; a strong one- and it's finally shown up to fight.

THANK YOU JESUS!

I will continue to update my journey...  the phasing out of medication and inclusion of oils.  Not the specialists idea of what I should do, but to hell with that.  TO HELL.  I am done.

Anyways, I'll be documenting my  internal oil usage on here to hold myself accountable and to show you that I'm not just talking the talk, but truly, walking the walk.

Prayers would be so greatly appreciated.

Prayers have BEEN appreciated.  Someone, somewhere said a prayer to snap me out of it... and today, that happened.

Thank you friends.

Thank you LORD!


Here I go!

Oils used today:
(1 drop each for immune support & liver function)- oregano, thieves, fennel

(1 drop each for tummy/digestive issues)- digize, ginger, cinnamon

(1 drop each for energy/brain power/functioning lol)-  lemon, lavender, peppermint, slique, frank and a shot of Nxinga red.

(1 drop each for kidney function)- juniper, lemon, chamomile


And THAT folks... is how I'm doin' this.  My body loves me already! :D

(seriously- I feel better- more upbeat, more energy, happier than I have in months).

God bless this new journey and these oils. 

XOXO-
Ash ;)